Day 280: It all makes sense... kind of

I'm a tv girl, and I always have been.

I grew up watching tv, and I work in tv now, so it's no surprise that I take a lot away from tv shows.

As I'm sitting here tonight watching one of my favorite shows one phrase is sticking with me.

In this episode one of the guys is dating a younger girl. I'm guessing he's in his mid-30's (they've never really said) but they did say she is 22.

Talk about being able to relate! I'm really struggling with this whole younger guy thing so anything to help me get a greater understanding or rationale on it makes me feel better.

I have a hard time with things I don't understand, or can't make up a reason to help me understand.

So during the show after everyone voices their concerns about the girl being too yong, and the guy saying 'no, I like her I'm having fun!' (Wow... sounds so very familiar.)

Finally one of the girls says 'I think you are seeing this girl because she reminds you of something you want to hold on to or the person you used to be.'

Ding.. ding... ding... we have a winner! Holy crap! Now it all makes sense!

Not that I'm searching out the younger guys, but I'm also not turning them down when they find me.

I think that's what I'm doing. I'm trying to hold onto my youth because I'm uncomfortable (yeah... that's the word for it... uncomfortable) with what 40 has in store.

Meanwhile, I'm ready to jump on every possibility of a single guy. What is wrong with me? I've never felt this wsay before! It's like a I'm a teenage boy.

If someone even mentions a guy, my mind immediately starts thinking 'hmmmm I wonder if he's single', or if I run into a guy somewhere I start to think the same thing.

I guess that means I'm ready, the problem is, the old saying. You don't find love, it finds you when you're least expecting it. So basically I'm screwed unless I can turn off my hormones.