Day 279: The same but different

I lead a pretty blessed life.

Today I was one of the first people in my city to see the new movie Eat Pray Love, and I got to see it 3 days before the rest of the country.

Not many people can say that, and I get to say it a lot. Because of my job I get to see movies before they come out.

Like most movies everyone takes away something different when it's all said and done.

As I sat there in between the Cheerleader and my BFF, I had to wonder if they saw as much of myself in Liz Gilbert as I did.

In reality, they probably saw MORE than I did! At every turn, there was something else... stop obsessing... stop controling... stop thinking.

It's all so true, everyone is constantly telling me those things. Unfortunately I'm one of those people who will obsess about not thinking so it's kind of a no win situation until I can figure it out.

One of the quotes in the movie goes something like this 'Give up and stop obsessing and trying to control the situation and the universe will rush in.'

I need to stop and I think the universe is trying to tell me that (see what I mean about thinking it never stops).

As I head to the fridge for a glass of water there is my 'I will not obsess... I will not obsess' magnet staring at me like a neon sign in the middle of a country town.

I think for some reason I need to stop obsessing to get where I need to be, and I say that because in some weird way my life is moving in cycles.

It's like the movie Groundhog Day but in a much longer format.

Seven years ago I was comfortable with my job and looking for love. I was going out with a lot of different guys after a big break up, hoping one of them would be 'the one'.

When I finally calmed down and stopped looking.. or maybe I just got exhausted and gave up... either way when I stopped thinking and obsessing I found Mr. Wonderful, and the rest is history.

I'm getting there again. I feel like I'm grasping at every straw, going out with every guy because they could be 'the next one' but I'm tired, except for the bobcat thing... I have to admit that's pretty fun.

So maybe, just maybe this hampster wheel I'm trapped in is leading me somewhere good and it's the place I'm meant to be

One of the other quotes in the movie said 'trust in love again', at that point the Cheerleader and my fellow cry-baby looked at me and waived a tissue in my face.

Yes, trust in love again....